I'm such a blog slacker

One of my new Year resolutions this year was to fall off the face of the planet. I had a particularly unpleasant start to my year and felt like I needed more "me time". I kept mostly to myself and did a lot of soul searching. I felt like a Mission was something I would like to do, and then I told everyone about it (because, well, that's pretty exciting news) but I really haven't updated any of my online social networking sites since.

SOOO much has happened. I'm sorry for keeping everyone in the dark.

so here's to catching you up.

My mission goals are somewhat on the back burner. you can thank my boyfriend Christian for that. not that he told me not to go (not directly at least) but I've got other things on my mind at the moment.

Christian Mears and I started hanging out a lot about two weeks into January. our ward would play basketball Monday nights after F.H.E., and that was the first time I'd ever really talked to him. aside from hellos at Church. we quickly realized how well we got along and became very good friends. we both like a lot of the same nerdy things.

bikes
Anime cartoons
dungeons and dragons

camping and things of the like

i like to bake, he likes to eat baked goods. He is entertained when I'm being a super weirdo, or "feisty" as Desi and he like to call it. we'd long board together, lay out and watch the stars while telling "scary stories", and stay up all hours of the night most nights.

it wasn't too long before we realised we were a pretty good match and maybe we should try being a little more than friends.

Desi saw it before I did though. In fact EVERYONE saw it before me.

I was in a mode. Mission mode. I was sure I wasn't going to meet someone and so I wasn't even looking. and when I did think i might like him more than I liked my other friends I told myself "Alex, come on. not every encounter has to be a romantic one. you can just like christian because you are such good friends. maybe you're blowing it out of proportion".

I've got an all or nothing approach when it comes to my feelings for someone. I don't want to toy with the idea of a crush unless I'm sure it's worth the stress. because crushes are stressful if your name is Alex Freeman. all of the sudden you have to wonder about where they stand in the matter. you have to try to figure out what flirting means and you have do it no matter how cheesy you feel doing it, mostly because Desi makes you.

do i hold his hand? what are the rules for that? should i be straight out? play it cool?

and so I did all of that stressing for all of march until the 24th when we were official.

and Now we spend all of our time together. that's not an exaggeration. if he's not working and we're both awake, we are together.

if i had a picture to post I would, but Christian hates to be photographed and sabotages all of my attempts. I am just gonna have to be more sneaky about it I suppose.

I'm gonna sign off. Christian is heading over and we're gonna go play some D&D. haha